Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Day 10 (7/30/12)

  • pea salad (10 carbs?)
  • 5 meatballs with BBQ sauce and slice of cheese melted over (6 carbs)
  • water

  • smoked fish (4)
  • egg salad (1)
  • mac-n-cheese with extra cheddar (12)
  • large glass of milk (15)
  • blueberries (15) 
  • cookies (34)
Total - DISASTER (97, ugh)

Started out with good intentions, and even bought some smoked fish at the store just for dinner.. it was smoked with salt and sugar but posed little threat to a low-carb meal on it's own.  However, my son did not finish his mac-n-cheese and I thought "it's just a little bit" so I draped on way more cheddar and nuked it for an over-the-top treat.  Then I was craving milk - which I poured a glass, and of course HAD to finish.. The blueberries were maybe gonna go bad but then the cravings kicked in and it was time to hit the hard stuff - the cookies.  Partly I think that this is due to the length of time which I let myself eat.. I was clearly full by the time I really slipped up but could have gone right on eating much longer.  Maybe a time limit would help.

Monday, July 30, 2012

Day 9 (7/29/12)


  • bacon and broccoli salad
  • no-grain tabouleh
  • 6 oz. orange juice 
  • water 


  • milk - 10 oz
  • grape juice - 16 oz.
  • 6 oz. Campbell's chicken noodle (broth only)
  • 3 crackers with brie
  • 1 slice of pumpkin pie
  • 2 small rice krispy squares with chocolate
  • 1 bite of brownie (had to throw most away as it was TOO sweet)

Not even going to add this up.. the kicker was that the chocolate treats were on the stale side so not even as good as they could be - and not really worth the guilt.  Bought the cheap pumpkin pie from the store because I had been thinking that the filling of a pumpkin pie would have lots of fiber, and the net carbs would be low.  The crust was awful and the whole thing tasted like cardbaord - now I need to figure out how to get this stuff out of the kitchen so I don't have to even look at it.

There was one moment where I had to decide to go over the edge, and almost walked away from the carbs, but then decided I HAD to have them or they would be controlling me as much as NOT having them.. not sure if that makes sense or was just a justification..

Back on track tomorrow..

Day 8 (7/28/12)


  • bacon and broccoli salad (4)
  • no-grain tabouleh (5)
  • two pieces of lox with cream cheese and capers (2)
  • water


  • mini-meatloaf (4)
  • steamed broccoli (5)
  • small salad with dressing (5)
  • water (0)
  • piece of homemade apple and blackberry pie (18)
  • 2 cookies (oatmeal chocolate chip) - (15?)
Total carbohydrates for the day: 58

I am totally guessing on the carbs now.. just my estimations.  Went nuts on the carbs and the homemade goodies at my grandma's house were almost worth it, but must get back on track. 

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Day 5 (725/12)

Breakfast - 3:40 AM
  • no-bread BLT(A)s:
    • 7 pieces of turkey bacon (5 carbs)
    • lettuce (2 carbs) 
    • tomato, one small (6 carbs)
    • mayo (1 carb)
  • last of the leftover onion eggs (3 carbs)
  • ginger tea (17 carbs) - OOPS, thought it was just like tea!
  • water
pre-dinner glucose check - 101!!

Dinner - 9 PM

  • 1/2 an avocado with salt and lemon (3)
  • pea salad
    • 3/4 cup peas (15)
    • 1 green onion (0)
    • 1 egg yolk (1)
    • 1 spoonful mayonnaise (1)
  • 1 piece of strong soft cheese (0)
    • on a cracker (3)
  • double portion of tabouleh - cucumbers, tomato, parsley, olive oil, salt, lemon juice (8)
  • 1/2 cup of cantaloupe melon (10)

Total carbohydrates for the day: 34 breakfast + 41 dinner = 75 *yikes*

Thoughts:  One of the ideals in Islam is to stop eating while you still feel hungry, so as i was eating dinner and tried to do that.  It slowed me down a bit, but i definitely could have stopped, in terms of having already eaten enough at one point but my brain/cravings still said to keep eating.  Near the end, i got out a rice krispy treat that my aunt had made with peanut butter (topped with chocolate), intending to eat it.  I got it out of the cookie jar - and put it in front of me.  I smelled it deeply.  I smelled it again.  I almost started to cry (granted i was watching a particularly teary episode of Glee at the time).  Then I put it back.

It has now been over a week since I have had chocolate, milkshakes, cookies, donuts, cupcakes, candy or cake.  The cravings are getting weaker and only in moments like those above is it a problem.  Walking by the candy jar at work is not an issue - it is the baked goods that call to me (like carrot cake with cream cheese frosting) or a nice, cold, rich, real-ice-cream milkshake.  The problem with most items I crave: they never taste quite as great as they seem like they will. Maybe the cravings are better than actually eating them (the wanting is better than the getting). 

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Day 4 (7/24/12)

Breakfast - overslept! Actually, my iPhone dock was not powered on so it did not make any sound when the alarm went off so I skipped food and drink and vitamins this morning.. it will be a long day, presumably.  Maybe this was just getting too easy!

The good news is I slept for almost a solid 8 hours for the first time in a week.

glucose at 9 PM - 98!!

Dinner - 9:10 PM
  • 1 blueberry, to break my fast (free)
  • no-grain tabouleh: 
    • cucmber, tomatoes, parsley (5 grams)
    • oil, salt, lemon juice (1 gram?)
  • tried to make garlic fried green beans like my favorite chinese food place:
    • green beans, cooked (4 grams)
    • garlic in oil, amino acids for salt (1 gram?)
  • 10 slices of turkey bacon (5 grams)
  • 1 pint of blueberries, because i just could not stop (8,000 grams)
  • 2 meatballs (2 grams)
  • 4 pistachios (free)

Total carbohydrates for the day: 17 plus infinity... :(

Insights: cravings were less intense and more specific today - chocolate /caramel is big but also broccoli.  Milkshake, beer.  Going away slowly.. ever so slowly.

Lesson: don't let your cravings stare you in the face.  If possible, don't buy foods you can't say no to.  If it's not your choice, put them somewhere you won't have to see them.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Day 3 (7/23/12)

Breakfast - 3:38 AM

  • Salad: cucumber, tomato & mixed greens with Ranch (5 carbs)
  • Leftover onion eggs (2 carbs)
  • water - not enough (0 carbs)
Dinner - 9 PM
  • 3 meatballs, with Bar-B-Que sauce (5 carbs)
  • salad: 
    • mixed greens and spinach with avocado, cucumber, bell pepper and basil (7 carbs)
    • olive oil, salt, pepper and fresh lemon juice (0 carbs)
  • 5 black olives (2 carbs)
  • teensy, tiny Pringles single pak (12 carbs)
  • water - as much as i could drink (0 carbs)

Total carbohydrates for the day: 35

Insights: Was so full from dinner that it was difficult to eat and drink enough for breakfast, and I was hungry by 10 AM.  However, the hunger comes for a minute and goes away.. it's the incessant mutterings of my brain that constantly bring pictures of glazed donuts, and sparkling clear apple juice like some kind of junk food commercial that really makes fasting difficult.  

I must do this.  For my health, for me.  Things will only get worse from here if I don't take a stand - and the type 2 diabetic track I've been headed down is not a roller coaster of my own choosing.  I always told myself that I could stop - when I really wanted to. But never found the motivation.  This is the time - here.  Now. 

Allergies acted up the last few days, by tearing my throat to pieces and I kept forgetting to take my Flonase until tonight.. we'll see how it is tomorrow.  Something in the salad tonight gave me an instant reaction and it must be the bell pepper, since everything else is something I've had recently.

Day 2 (7/22/12)

Breakfast - 3:35 AM
  • "onion eggs":
    • 1/3 sliced white onion, fried with olive oil (3 carbs)
    • 3 eggs
    • salt, pepper, fish sauce, p. i. n. c. h. of sugar (0 carbs)
  • salad: 
    • mixed greens with tomato, cucumber and 1/2 of an avocado (13 carbs)
    • with lots of Ranch dressing (2 carbs)
  • water - lots (0 carbs)
Dinner - 9 PM

  • fruit, 1/2 strawberry, 2 grapes (at least 3 carbs)
  • 1/2 cup of basmati rice (30 carbs)
  • chicken, lots (0 carbs)
  • creamy "marsala" sauce (4 carbs)

Total daily carbohydrates: 55 *OUCH*

Insights - Well it is clear that (in general) it is best to steer clear of places that serve the type of food you just cannot avoid.  For instance, don't go to an Indian restaurant if you won't be able to resist the naan or the rice or butter chicken or whatever it is that you are attempting to keep out of your diet.  For me, i was able to avoid the mango lassi and desserts but went overboard on rice and a bit of fruit.

The Friday before - when i was "practice fasting" and could eat during the day at my own discretion but was still trying to avoid carbs, i took my son to the BK play area and got chicken strips with a small fry for my son.  Even though the fries were not that good (actually, they were pretty awful), i still had more than a couple, because it was so hard to resist them being there in front of me.

Lesson: don't go if you cannot ignore the foods you are trying to avoid. For instance, don't go to the movies if you simply must have popcorn and Coke.  Try to find alternative snacks, but if it doesn't work, go to the park instead and bring your healthy meal. 

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Day 1 (7/21/12)

Breakfast - 3:30 AM

  • turkey   (0 carbs)
  • soft Havarti, 4 oz. (0 carbs)
  • pickle slice (0 carbs)
  • 2 basil leaves (0 carbs)
  • water - lots   (0 carbs)

Dinner - 9 PM

  • zuchini, cooked - 1/2 cup   (1 carbs)
  • green beans, cooked - 5 whole  (1 carbs)
  • rice pilaf - 1/3 cup   (15 carbs?)
  • sunflower seeds, 1/3 cup   (10 carbs)
  • water - lots   (0 carbs)

Total for Day 1 - 17 grams of carbohydrates, estimated

Energy level - good

Friday, July 20, 2012


In order to get ready, for the last two days i have been drinking water at night and waking up at 3 to eat - then going back to sleep.  On top of which, i will not eat much of anything during the day - Thursday i ate a handful of nuts, some Odwalla "Green Machine" juice, tea and water, then ate dinner at 7, today i had one piece of calamari, some pho broth, more juice and water - i'll try to go even later before eating dinner.  Tomorrow begins Ramadan and that means no food or water between approximately 4 AM and 9 PM, Pacific Time.

Not planning on exercising much, but maybe walking a bit; have put the LA Fitness membership on hold for at least a month.  I am definitely feeling the burn of hunger during my "practice fasts" and have cut out sweets, other than the juice and sauces/condiments with some sugar thrown in.  Time to remove all food and water containers from my desk and the work fridge in order to minimize reminders.  Need to put my medicine/vitamins out where i remember to take them at 9 PM and 4 AM, etc..

Preparation tasks:

  • Hard-boiling eggs
  • Pre-cooking meat: Chicken can be added to salads or alone
  • Preparing salads: Broccoli is good with mayo dressing for a creamier salad or vinegar (or just olive oil with ground salt and pepper) and other salads can be tossed without dressing for eating next day
  • Putting away the juicer: trying to give up fruits and sugars once Ramadan starts for the whole month!
Feeling good.  Feeling more prepared than ever before - i can do this!

Monday, July 16, 2012

It's four days before Ramadan and I am feeling the heat.  I have given up coffee (for the most part) and sugar remains a constant struggle.  My doctor thinks that writing down the struggle will be a learning experience and help to make it real.  May 1 through 10 of this year, we both gave up carbs for the most part - less than 20 grams of sugar per day, we both went into ketosis and i lost a few pounds (i spent the entire time thinking about chocolate cake and gained it all back within a weekend).

This time, it's personal - it's Ramadan.  The glorious gift of forgiveness and mercy brought to the Muslims worldwide for the sake of getting in touch with our humanity, our religion, our community and our Lord.  No food or drink from dawn to sunset and only meat and veggies at night aught to reset my internal patterns, so - it's on for Ramadan!

This blog will be personal, emotional and EXTREMELY PERSONAL.  If you aren't interested in my personal details and daily food journal, etc... Don't read it - duh!

God bless you all and grant us peace, ameen.